me with high fever (I was six and Alvin,4). i remember Alvin asking me for a share for Mama's "lugaw".

The thought of making a more personal blog came to me and for the first post I decided to make one for a dear brother who had made better choices than I did.

After the death of our mother in 1999, everything turned into a different axis, the world seemed to stop for all of us, everything looked so unfamiliar that we have to sleep our way through sadness and longing so we could enjoy what has been. We had to move on and “moving on” became a scene in a movie when one has to go for a better reason and one has to stay for the best of the rest who are left behind. The scene from he movie became a reality for us for Alvin has to leave for “greener” pastures because when Mama was still alive we cannot make the choices and if ever we had then we would choose to go away for the good of all but our hearts cannot leave even if everything in us wants to.

Now that my brother is in the land of opportunities, he has totally moved on and made the choices that he can. What we are today is the sum of our past doings, our achievements and failures, our choices and sacrifices. If the choice that one makes will make him happy: then it is a good decision and if one gets too far that he has a hard time coming back to point one he has always a choice to go back or move on farther.

After so many missed birthdays and holidays and our family pictures are always incomplete, we tend to make the incompleteness a natural feeling. We have become used of the fact that Christmases and New Years are celebrated through texts and phone calls, birthday greetings do not come in greeting cards anymore and a warm hug during a birthday kiss have become unfamiliar emotions of love and care. If we have lost what we had for years there is always a choice to make.

I know Alvin has made a better choice for all of us even if it makes his Christmases so different from our warm homemade holidays but it is a choice he had made and for all the choices we make we are always happy that we made it than not doing it a all.

Happy birthday, nong, luto mi pancit ron for longer life and more chances for choices.

Our warmest and happiest love for you.